IUI Round 4 Result: Negative

I had the blood test on Saturday and unfortunately it was negative.  I had suspected that it would be, and thought I was prepared, but the result hit me a lot harder than I expected.  I had to flee work and then spent the rest of the afternoon swinging between raging and bawling my eyes out.  I tried to make a chocolate cake to make myself feel better and the cake mix exploded everywhere.  In short, it was not a very pleasant day!

After discussing the result with each other and with my Mum, we've formulated a plan.  We are going to take a year off actively trying to conceive.  If we get pregnant in that time with no assistance, great, but it won't be our focus.  Instead, we are going to save up for a big overseas trip in September with my parents.  It's my Mum's 60th birthday in early September and she is very keen to go to Italy while my sister is there and see some other sights in Europe also.  Obviously a Europe trip is very expensive, and so I also suggested an alternative could be Asia.  In either case, we will have an extended holiday around that time.

In the mean time, this blog will be fairly quiet.  I may occasionally post updates here, but it will essentially be dormant for a while.

If you read my personal blog you'll know I'm a fan of the game Dragon Age II.  There was recently new Downloadable Content (DLC) released for this game.  While playing through the DLC, you encounter the following quote:

In uncertainty, find infinite possibility.

        - An old Orlesian saying 

I really love this quote and I am making it my touchstone for the following year.  I'm uncertain what my future holds, but that simply means there are infinite ways my future can play out.

IUI Episode IV: A New Hope

(Bonus geek points if you get the title reference).

So.  Here we are at our final IUI round of the year.  I started my injections on Friday (after a bit of a hiccup forgetting in the morning in the rush to get my dog to the vet - I did my first injection in the evening) and have my first blood test and scan on Friday next week, which will be Day 9.  I'm shooting for a Monday insem but as usual, it's not entirely in my control!  I feel a bit more blasé about this round, which is surprising because I thought I'd be stressing out that we're up to round 4 with no result.  I guess a wait-and-see approach is my only option at this point.  So, let's wait and see.

IUI Round 3 Result: Negative

Another negative.  In my gut I knew that was the result, but there's always that tiny hope that I'm wrong.  We tested a day later than normal this cycle and I still hadn't started bleeding but I guess that was just the progesterone.  We've decided to go straight into the next cycle, which we've never done before, mainly because of the timing: we have a mini-holiday at the end of November and then after that it's Christmas etc.  So we wanted to get in our last try of the year before all that happened.

I haven't lost hope just yet.  We have one more round to go before we reassess.  In some ways that will make this upcoming round harder to deal with, I think - knowing it's our last try.  But of course it's not the end of the road.  We could continue with IUI cycles next year.  We could get pregnant naturally.  We could consider adoption.  IVF, at this point, I would only consider if we were in a position financially where I didn't have to work, because I just don't think I could handle the stress and intrusiveness of it.  And of course, it's financially out of reach for us right now in any case.

So.  One more round to close out the year.  Fingers crossed it's fourth time lucky.